Posts
Sorry, my heart, to keep depriving you although you really wanted to be filled in. So many doubts have been feeding you from my mind that's so used to overthink, thinking you are not enough, you can't handle overwhelming emotion and pain... but you oh so wanted to open up, knowing from deep within you are capable of it.
But I still kept you, inside a shell.
I keep telling you, you are not ready.
No, not now, maybe not ever.
You are asking many times, when will I ever be ready?
Aren't you so used to being lonely?
Yes, I know you are so used to being lonely. But I'm afraid you'll break you cannot catch up.
So many endless nights, waking up every 3 AM from this hollow, echoing, shouting chamber in your heart
" You need to let it out"
And yet here I am, your mind, your "master" still a prisoner of thoughts.
Keep telling you, " no, not now, people are dangerous to give your heart for.
" But what if not?" you asked.
What if all I ever need is this, to let me open, to let me be held, and be broke again... to find a shelter.
No, I cannot live alone... I cannot live alone. I need someone, I need a heart to guide me home.
My mind still shouts back.
No, I can't risk you, anymore. I know you, I know you more than anyone else. You are so used to giving all that energy, only to be left out. I promised-, I will keep you strong.
